Fool's Paradise

So now that a house is owned. that brings me out of a lull and desolation of not ever being able to own a house in the vicinity. Still God knows how i will possibly commute to office daily when it comes to it. There are several venues which are open for me with far more churn, but still the affinity remains for this stable life. And the difference between today and last time i was blogging is that now i have three more lives to take care of. And things really dont change. I still have the same love as i had when i was single. Every being is armed with their own agenda. No second thought about taking a defeat. Taking a defeat and walking with it. then the exhibition grows outside of your house as well. When an outsider cashes the same. When the unity is not complete. There was a time when i was thinking of pressing charges on this guy that encroached my house. Between that day and today, i visualized myself as a Supreme court judge showering vengeance on Commissioner. But the dint of really pardoning someone and then living the life with a harness of having pardoned someone has once again been exhibited by my dad. Lets just take it as another lesson from someone who should have done this house purchase way before and then saved me from all this misery. the onsites are for some reason not for me. Not that i wanted the highlight of my life to be travel, but there is no mention either from the universe about me travelling and earning some good money. Or so to say a better money. But for sure there was a day between the two days when i was driving, my mind prepped up to press charges on this guy when the deal is through that was dangling midway. That day i learnt that why my father might have pardoned everything that came on the way. No matter how i see other people around me responding, but that is kind of the love and care that even i will trample my ego beneath my shoes when it comes to weigh the well-being of my kids. Yes this will add another feather and a year in the hat where you were called a loser. But in the end the heart knew who won. Does it really matter. Even if the whole land was attached, how long will it have taken to reset the composure. Maybe a life on second thought. Well in the end i only feel lucky that the turger and terse time is at least driving to an end and that too by biting your own ego under your teeth. Dont know how far the ego lessons will continue. So much said about the current temperament but no mention of what all has as well moved beneath all this. Beneath the decisions to avoid the ongoing PR process, which we never took heed of. What was sparking instead, why we never cared to look at this side. Oh the world was beautiful. The work from home in itself was an era. Where all the fake people were called out. Where the pleasure of staying at home and cashing all the perks lie. Where the joy of not knowing another soul awkwardly lies. Where a thankless pursuit did not even get to begin only to realize in the end that it will be fake. I am jolted with so much capable ecosystems like google and microsoft. Oh boy. the work and personal profile of microsoft apps is a eighth wonder of the world. Yes its right time to accept that most of the things that i have not done till now like writing a book or releasing an album or creating a blog and many more should be let gone. I also feel that where i sit in due time during the course of the day is what i should embrace and give those people back some courtesy. Those people are my family. What will i get by drifting here and there and then in the end drop all the thoughts only to breath in the same room as my family. How confident i am that even after exposing some people to so much of unsuppport, still thinks will not go south. How will i repay all this confidence and blindfaith that is there. Do i feel like a king saying that. Yes i do. Do i have the answer with me of anyways what all is happening. Yes i do. But do i still feel that an outsider will come and support me the way i feel that i am entitled for this shyt. Yes i do so as well. What is the difference between today and when i was age 10. None really. I thought that over the years i have enfolded to mature, to exhibit what is so inclined as being strong. But eventually i am realizing that the balance that body needs i not being in strong and sturdy only. Before that a recognition of diet and atmosphere and where the mental peace lies is also a step of stairs. There are some important office works. Buried in the frustration of not being able to self learn, not able to shine myself as the count of experience denotes. Not being able to shower my wrath on Commissioner for a neighbor encroaching my land. And in the end losing track of what i was pursuing before the current task. But what has become rhythmic is that i remember that it was only difficult and back-tolling to keep coped with the current ask. People are harboring different traits. The traits of playing with the expectations and words and never coming clean with commitments. There is always a scope of backbiting and it works sweet for everyone. Maybe i took the journey too literally and went into coming in a too frail composition. Once i was this badly thrashed in college. Similar distraught timeline occured. Well i am no more confident or want to keep confident that there is blindfaith. The urge to punish me has gone too far. Just a silent walkaway everytime is a good trigger. Ignoring it is also ok. But i need to walk away from this. A way is to join a office where this walk away time gets eclipsed. Another way is to kick start my own site or venture and pray that it works and then become busy and healthily involved.

Painful amount of tolls in maharashtra

There is a ridiculous amount of tolls when you go through thane to nashik.
If you change a road for a parallel road you will easily face a toll again. And one of the toll near LonI had such a messy traffic all the way and then toll for it. And that toll guy was threatening our driver that its better to keep shut some places. That's when you pay and are asked to not question it.

Some difference

Some difference between sapient and Samsung. I never felt like throwing my life into work. I mean I had limits. But round here I was puzzledd how can people go to all that extent and there were limits to which I went. Here I am able to see that the work has a destination and recognition.

I think I can vouch out to throw my life into work now on as I am better assured by things and finally there will be a silver lining.

Melodious Death

Am F C
In paddock while walking
Am F C
Maracas killed a man
G D
Percussion was gallivanting
Am G
After peregrination

Am F C
I professed the sham
Am F C
In hillock while waiting
G D
For the glub globetrotter
Am G
A clarinet turned oncogene

the water bottle

Friday 19 Nov. I never ever dreamt in my wildest thoughts that i will be sipping this plain water on the lands of Ggn. I had to be in some arms.

So the moment i picked this bottle i saw the ashes falling from a chopper everywhere around. I could identify and highlight from the whole view of 16 people the 3 people picking the exact same bottle in the exact same way. A gross closeness. Just a different attribute.

reason to switch here is that i dont want to bother 350 friends on fb coz some of them wont appreciate it

yeah so i am pretty harnessed.
T funny thing is that she dosen even know what this pain is costing.
and the irony is that she knows everything
The consumption is that i had to convert the tide.
the fallacy is that i needed some blessing from above, the always blessing that i somewhere betrayed. The iota i had was never appreciated by me. the dint of playing has played around with me for some reason.

Just waiting in the limbo. Something will lift me. Something will bring everything along as well. So much so for the broad specs. Now lets narrow down. All so by a thin man.

personalish